What my doctor said to me to make me want a natural birth…
I’ll always replay the day that I told my Ob-Gyn that I was ready to come off birth control so my husband and I could start trying to start our family. His response, which I’ll share in a moment, is ultimately what me realize that a natural birth is for me!
I was in the office for my annual check-up. I was even nervous to tell the doctor that I wanted to come off birth control. Not sure I felt so nervous…maybe his response explains it haha
He said “Oh, your hips are too small. I can guarantee that you will need a c-section.” 😳
In 2014, when this doctor said this to me, my initial thought was I do NOT want to be cut open. That seems odd that he would make such a comment. I was just talking to him about stopping birth control.
And I am the same height and build as my mom, so why would I need a c-section if she was able to deliver 3 out of the 5 of us vaginally?! (The other 2 of my siblings were twins born via c-section.)
Needless to say, I was very inspired to find other options.
I stopped birth control and we started trying to grow our family in early 2015. It actually took us a year to get pregnant with our first daughter.
During that time between 2015-2016, my cousin had her 2nd baby, born via water birth at a hospital that ‘allows’ water births with midwives.
I was very intrigued why she chose this route and to learn more.
I started asking her lots of questions about a water birth…the pain, does the baby inhale the water, is it gross?
I shared with her what my provider had said to me and she acknowledged that was a terrible comment and I should find a new provider.
She shared with me her experience with a water birth and how she wished she had went that route with her first child.
So, I started researching it. Talking to people I knew who had babies. And they all said the same damn thing… “I went to the hospital, had an epidural, had this and that done, etc.”
Something didn’t feel right about that. I didn’t know a lot about birth then, but I felt like all of these interventions seemed like ‘too much.’
So, I continued to research water birth and natural birth in general. The more I researched and read other women’s stories, the more I knew this seemed like the route I wanted to attempt. There are no guarantees with how your birth will go, except you will birth a baby.
My cousin didn’t really take any classes (except for the water birth classes required by the hospital), but she did hire a doula, along with her midwife.
Once my husband and I finally got pregnant in 2016, we had to decide what classes to take.
Before classes, we had to find a new provider. When I initially got pregnant, we were still with that same Ob-Gyn that made that awful assumption about MY own body.
Hindsight says I would’ve switched providers long before that, but I was just going for annual checkups so I didn’t think too much about it, other than I knew he was not delivering my baby.
And since I’m ‘kinda crunchy,’ it was nice to have that initial ultrasound for our first baby and know things were going ok. We switched to a midwifery practice around 15 weeks.
Once we found our new provider and switched, we started looking into birthing classes. Back in my mom’s day, it was Lamaze. I’m sure they are great (my mom had 3 natural births with those classes) but we wanted more, something different.
We found Bradley Birthing Classes. We loved that you go to classes, practice the techniques with an instructor, have a workbook for reference and notes and it just seemed very well thought out. Then, we found an amazing instructor in our area.
We started our Bradley Birthing Classes and started learning more about natural birthing, including birthing positions (no, you don’t have to birth on your back) and positions that are optimal for birthing, how your partner can support you, mindset around pain and birth, ways to deal with the pain, a little bit of breastfeeding (see more about that here) and a community of supportive and like-minded families.
To this day, we are still friends with 2 of the families from our Bradley Class in 2016!!!
One thing that we watched during our classes (I believe this was a recommendation of our doula and not necessarily from the Bradley Course itself) is to watch the Business of Being Born. This documentary talks about how babies being born in a hospital is essentially a business thing and how labor and delivery has evolved over the years. It is a MUST WATCH for any pregnant mama that wants to take control of her body and her birth!!!!
My husband and I completed the Bradley Birthing course and felt prepared for a natural birth! We also hired a doula for additional support.
In October 2016, we welcomed our first daughter, via natural vaginal delivery. It was quite the amazing and empowering experience, and we will forever prepare for natural births as well as share my story to empower other women to take control of their labor and delivery, which means TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR BODY!
#rant How dare a man tell me exactly what my body can and can’t do!
How dare a man try to implant some false story into my head!
How dare a man tell me that my body is not capable of doing what it was made to do!
How dare a man try to control the outcome of a natural process! Who the hell are you…
It wasn’t until weeks or months after our first daughter was born that I realized that I f**kin’ proved his ass wrong! If you can’t tell, I am very passionate about this.
I am thankful for his rude and naïve comment because it empowered me to take control of my own body. To be informed! To know better…and do better!!!
I will share our birth story in another post (coming soon) because I’m sure some of you reading this are thinking ‘doesn’t that hurt’, ‘how did you deal with the pain’, etc. And to that, for now, I say I don’t even remember the pain. It was so temporary and so worth it to be in control plus the outcome is your sweet baby!
I encourage you to check out Bradley birthing classes (or any other natural birthing classes) to prepare, a doula is 100% worth every penny (just interview and do your research early) and know that your body was made to deliver a baby so preparing is key and having support!!! You can do this, mama!!!